My Positive Birth Story - vaginal delivery in Portsmouth QA

I was absolutely terrified of birth when I found out I was pregnant. I had had it drummed into me over most of my life that birth was scary, painful and likely to go on days (or worse - weeks!). I think a lot of people are the same as me in being scared on labour. You hear horror stories from relatives, the TV portrays it to be terrible and how often do you hear positive birth stories? Never! I remember thinking that I would just get an epidural or maybe even request an elective c-section. It was mentioned to be a couple of times about doing hypnobirthing, but the name didn’t sell it to me and I just thought it wouldn’t suit me or my body. Anyway, I bought a book on amazon and read it all. It was a bit of a drag getting through it but I finished it over a couple of months. There was definitely parts of it I found interesting but I wouldn’t say the book alone did too much for me!

I ended up seeing an ad on my instagram from The Birth Uprising TBU selling a free introduction to hypnobirthing so I signed up and sat through the session. I really liked the girls, they were super relaxed and pretty funny and I could relate to some of their style. There was a discount on for their digital pack so I snapped this up! The content was amazing. Listening it to it through their videos was so much more digestible than the book I read. They were able to make it light hearted and also serious where needed. This digital pack absolutely changed things for me. My mindset totally shifted and I started preparing myself for a positive birth.

I finished work 2 days before my due date because I worked from home and felt able to work that long on the comfort of my sofa! I spent the start of my maternity leave taking my dog out for walks and treating us both to breakfast out! It was lovely! I remember on one morning, the sun was shinning and we sat on the beach and just watched the waves going in and out, it was so peaceful and calming.

My EDD was a Friday, but there was no signs of baby making his show. So I headed off to Brighton to my besties hen do! The following Tuesday evening (4 days post EDD) I noticed some very mild cramping in the evening which were similar to period pains. Later that evening on going to the toilet I found that my mucus plug had started to show; there was blood on the tissue. I remember feeling soooooo excited by this. Something was definitely happening. Nothing too hectic went on that evening, but the cramping continued into the next day with further bits of mucus plug leaks. I remember I didn’t say anything to my boyfriend in case I jinxed it but on the Wednesday evening the crampings felt a bit tighter so I let him know. He laughed at me for not saying anything to him the day before. That evening me and my boyfriend drove up to Portsdown hill which overlooks the whole of Portsmouth. It was a lovely clear evening and we sat in the car with a cup of tea from a popular burger van and made the birth/labour music playlist. Cramps were coming intermittently but very manageable.

I woke early hours of Thursday with the cramps feeling quite a bit tighter, so much so, it woke me up a few times, I ended up getting up and going downstairs around 6am and started watching The Office. I tried to get back to sleep but was having quite intense cramps every 15-20 minutes or so, which stopped me getting back to sleep. The cramps by now felt like they were in my back, I would using my hypnobirthing breathing techniques through each cramp and felt they were manageable.

That day (Thursday) the cramps continued, not regular, and still quite random. We tried to get on with our day like normal. We were in the pet shop buying dog food, and I had a massive cramp to the point that I had to stop whilst out to lean over and concentrate on using my hypnobirthing breathing to carry me through this. I found it all quite amusing. Whilst I could see things were upping in their intensity, part of me was still in denial that it was actually happening! That night I was sure things were going to progress further, but things actually seemed to slow down. The cramps became worse in their intensity and about 2/3am I went downstairs as I couldn’t sleep. The cramps at this point were causing me to need to lean right over and really concentrate on using my hypnobirthing breathing techniques, however they were now only coming every 30 minutes or so. I drifted in an out of sleep until morning when my boyfriend came down.

Friday morning, they still only came every 30 minutes and felt like they slowed down in intensity as the morning went on. My boyfriend went for breakfast and then did a nice long walk along the beach and did some curb hopping in an attempt to get things going! During my hypnobirthing course I learnt about positive birth affirmations, so I repeated to myself ‘my baby is happy, my baby is healthy, my body was made to do this and my baby is ready to be born’ on a loop, both in my head and out loud. It was like my little mantra. Every time I said it, it gave me confidence and reassurances.

I teach all about the benefits of positive affirmations and how to use them in my full course!

On the Friday afternoon we actually had an appointment at Portsmouth QA to see the consultant. From my hypnobirthing course I had learnt about inductions and felt very strongly that I did not want one. I felt so strongly that I felt an elective c-section would be a better option for me. So we had an apointment to schedule the section in. When we arrived at the hospital we ended up needing to wait around an hour to see the consultant. During this time cramps seemed to become more regular. I was able to chat and laugh through most of them. I was still using hypnobirthing breathing techniques through them, but definitely felt able to manage. They were getting closer together though, although still 10-20 minutes apart. We had our appointment and booked the section in for the following Tuesday.

On getting home Friday afternoon we put the TV on and I cuddled up to my doggy and tried to get a bit of sleep. The cramps were coming at least every 10 minutes now, so out of curiosity I started to time and they were lasting 1-2 minutes and coming consistently every 10 minutes. They were higher in intensity, I was using my hypnobirthing breathing techniques each time. Some I was able to lay on my side for, but some I was needing to sit up and either lay back or bend right forward to relieve the discomfort. I still felt able to manage at home. I did have a TENS machine, but I didn’t felt they warranted needing it yet. I was still in denial things were happening!

That evening, I felt a funny popping sensation and went to the toilet and there appeared to be a wet patch in my pants. I changed my pants and went back downstairs, but felt further wetness so went to go and change again. After taking them off, I felt more wetness and realised that it was probably my waters going. They weren’t clear as I was expecting and was a brown-ish stain to them. I knew that this was something to let the hospital know about. Up until that point we had had no contact with Portsmouth QA as I hadn’t felt we were at that point yet. I gave triage a call and let them know about the stained waters and they advised to come in to be checked.

I let my boyfriend know and we got organised to head down to Portsmouth QA. The whole way there we were chatting about how to manage it if the hospital suggested an induction. We had a plan in place to how to we politely decline this. We both felt strongly that we didn’t want induction. Cramps were coming in around 10 minutes at this point. When we arrived to Portsmouth QA I told my boyfriend not to bother with the bags as I thought we would likely get checked and sent home to continue with labour until we were having more regular contractions and got into established labour. He said he would bring them just in case as easier to bring them back than need them and be without.

On walking up to the labour ward at Portsmouth QA I had three contractions. These were now causing me to need to stop and lean on something. My hypnobirthing breathing techniques were in full swing and were working magic at helping me manage with the pain I was feeling. My contraction were all in my back. I was confused by this and honestly couldn’t understand how my cervix could be opening if the only pain was in my spine. I figured out that if my boyfriend pressed as hard as possible on the case of my spine during contractions, this helped reduce some pain.

When we got up to the labour ward, they checked my waters and said it was meconium which meant baby boy had pooed inside me - either a sign of being ready to be born or possibly distress. As expected I was offered an induction which I declined and stated that I wanted to wait and see how things progress as clearly my body was doing something. This was accepted.

Due to having meconium in my waters they said they would want me to stay to keep an eye on things, which I agreed to. We were taking to our room and allocated a midwife. We dimmed the lights in the room and put our own music on, and I had some gas and air which was fab!

I was offered a vaginal examination VE. I was a bit sceptical about this. In my hypnobirthing course there was a few thoughts on the helpfulness of these as there is other signs to indicate how far a person is into their labour. I was sure I couldn’t be that progressed seeing as contractions had been at their closest point every 10 minutes when at home. They had increased a bit more since being at Portsmouth QA but I felt my expectations were quite low for how dilated I would be so it couldn’t hurt to have a VE to check. So anyway, I had my check and guess what… I was 9cm dilated! WOW! I’m not sure who was more shocked by this out of the midwives or me and my boyfriend! I was chuffed and this gave me a happy boost.

My boyfriend is quite the joker and brought a cow mask in for me (a little push present apparently.. haha) as when learning about birth we heard its very possible to moo like a cow. We planned to surprised one of the midwives at Portsmouth QA with me wearing it with our midwife and this gave us all a good laugh.

I had agreed to continuous monitoring because of the meconium in my waters but this meant I was sat on the bed a lot (not useful in positioning for baby!!) and the portable monitor fell off so they were back to the one wrapped around my bump. As I was sat down, it meant that baby got into an undesirable position and this made my contractions extremely difficult to manage. I was going strong with my hypnobirthing breathing techniques and the gas and air, but I was really struggling at this point. I started to contemplate if I could manage without any stronger pain relief or if I wanted a section. On reflection I wonder if I was transitioning at this point as was 9.5cm dilated. My boyfriend helped me decide to wait and see if we could get baby to turn back around before making any impulsive decisions that went against my wishes. The BRAIN skill came in very handy right now!!

More information about the BRAIN tool in my full hypnobirthing course!

An experienced midwife at Portsmouth QA came in and had me lay right on my side, with my bump pretty much hanging off the side of the bed. She had me stay in this position for three contractions to try and get baby boy to move back into the optimum position. And LUCKILY on the third contraction I literally felt his whole entire body flip over so he was facing my back. YES!! The contractions were still incredibly intense, but I felt like I could cope again.

Before I knew it we were ready to push!! I lost my head a bit here, probably the adrenalin needed to get baby boy out, but my leg was shaking, I was struggling to keep on top of my hypnobirthing breathing technique and at times felt I couldn’t do this. Thankfully my boyfriend and amazing birth partner got me through this last stage. He was soooo supportive, getting me water, words of encouragement, kisses and holding me the entire time. It was a funny feeling when he was born. I had heard about the ring of fire, but what I pictured with this and what it felt like were totally different. Whilst it was quite intense, it was a very short lived feeling. Once his head was born, the rest of his body felt like a bit of a breeze in comparison! I don’t even remember the placenta be born either!

The feeling when my son was born was complete and utter relief. I know for some its just overwhelming love, but for me this took a bit of time. And I know this completely normal and am okay that that was my experience. It was a very surreal experience. I was relieved that it was done. I was even more relieved that he had be been born healthy.

I was so lucky, but I didn’t get any tearing during my labour. I don’t know how long my official active labour was, but from getting to the hospital at around 9pm on the Friday, it took 9 hours for him to be born at 6am Saturday morning.

There are a few things I would do differently with my birth if I could do it again - firstly, when finding meconium in my waters, after being checked out, I would have either opted to go home to continue labour there, or I would of declined the monitoring. I think it was this that cause baby boy to move and this made contractions hard to cope with. I needed to be using my UFO positions, and when being monitored, I wasn’t doing this to its maximum capacity. I also would have worked harder to be in a UFO position when pushing, as despite knowing what I needed to do, I found it hard to get the energy to move from being laid on the bed and I think this made pushing harder.

Despite these minor changes, I feel incredibly proud of myself. I learnt so much in my hypnobirthing course and because of this, I was able to have a vaginal delivery using only gas and air and hypnobirthing breathing techniques as pain relief. I was able to know my rights and decline an induction which I knew was not for me. I gave birth to my happy and healthy baby boy.

More details in my full course about UFO positions!

However, I cannot stress how overall I had an amazing experience. The days of slow labour were exciting. The cramps and contractions at this time were manageable. I did not feel that I needed any pain relief other than the hypnobirthing breathing techniques. I only went to hospital because my waters weren’t clear. Had it not of been for that, he could of ended up a surprise home birth!

I look back at my labour fondly, and in a bizarre way wish I could do it again. It makes me so excited to have another baby and I know for sure that I would want them to be born at home.